February 08, 2006

Compare and Contrast Time

The Los Angeles Times on Coretta Scott King's funeral: "Bush Gets an Earful at Coretta King's Funeral"

LITHONIA, Ga. -- A day of eulogizing Coretta Scott King turned into a rare, in-person rebuke of President Bush, with a succession of civil rights and political leaders assailing White House policies as evidence that the dream of social and racial equality pursued by King and her slain husband is far from reality.

{...}But it also included pointed political commentary, much of it aimed at Bush. The president and his wife watched as the sanctuary at New Birth Missionary Baptist Church near Atlanta filled with raucous cheers for their White House predecessors, Bill and Hillary Clinton -- a reminder that five years into his term, Bush and the Republican Party he leads have not found the acceptance across black America that GOP strategists had hoped.

"This commemorative ceremony this morning and this afternoon is not only to acknowledge the great contributions of Coretta and Martin, but to remind us that the struggle for equal rights is not over," said former President Carter, a Democrat and former Georgia governor, to rising applause. "We only have to recall the color of the faces of those in Louisiana, Alabama and Mississippi, those who were most devastated by Katrina, to know that there are not yet equal opportunities for all Americans."

Carter, who has had a strained relationship with Bush, drew cheers when he used the Kings' struggle as a reminder of the recent debate over whether Bush violated civil liberties protections when he ordered warrantless surveillance of some domestic phone calls and e-mails.

Noting that the Kings' work was "not appreciated even at the highest level of the government," Carter said: "It was difficult for them personally -- with the civil liberties of both husband and wife violated as they became the target of secret government wiretapping, other surveillance, and as you know, harassment from the FBI." Bush has said his own program of warrantless wiretapping is aimed at stopping terrorists.

The most overtly partisan remarks came from the Rev. Joseph Lowery, a King protege and longtime Bush critic, who noted Coretta King's opposition to the war in Iraq and criticized Bush's commitment to boosting the poor.

"She deplored the terror inflicted by our smart bombs on missions way afar," he said. "We know now there were no weapons of mass destruction over there. But Coretta knew and we knew that there are weapons of misdirection right down here. Millions without health insurance. Poverty abounds. For war, billions more, but no more for the poor."{...}

Compare this to the WaPo's "Coretta Scott King's Legacy Celebrated in Final Farewell."

{...}The six-hour service, held in a lavish black church in the wealthy, majority-black Atlanta suburb of DeKalb County, seemed to strive mightily to project a theme of inclusion and the setting aside of political differences. Among the speakers were four of the five living U.S. presidents; several lawmakers; the Georgia governor, who is locked in a pitched battle with black lawmakers over voting rights; and a television evangelist.

Several high-profile -- and politically charged -- black figures, such at the Rev. Jesse L. Jackson and the Rev. Al Sharpton, were not accorded a place onstage.

Still, political tensions occasionally burst through the veneer of reconciliation. At one point, the Rev. Joseph E. Lowery, a former head of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC), the group Martin Luther King Jr. helped found, made a reference to not finding weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. The well-heeled, mostly black crowd erupted in a standing ovation.

In his speech, former president George H.W. Bush noted that Lowery's address was all in rhyme. "Maya Angelou has nothing to worry about," he said, looking at Lowery. "Don't quit your day job."

Former president Bill Clinton, whose popularity among black people has not waned, was greeted like a returning hero, his remarks peppered with wild ovations and his one-liners greeted by raucous laughter. He dedicated his speech to the King children: Yolanda, Martin Luther III, Dexter and Bernice.

"Her children, we know they have to bear the burden of their mother and father's legacy," Clinton told the crowd. "We clap for that, but they have to go home and live it." He challenged the mourners. "You want to treat our friend Coretta like a role model? Then model her behavior."{...}

I'm assuming that each of these stories will be their respective newspaper's front page story for this morning's editions.

Now, do tell, my devoted Cake Eater Readers, which one actually reports on the funeral?

No matter how many times you see it, the bias can---and will---take your breath away.

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February 07, 2006

Talking Back to Conversation Hearts

heart1.jpg

Well, do you really?

Ummm. Well, see...here's the thing. You may miss moi, but I don't miss you.

At all.

I think more about which shade of polish I painted my toenails than I think about you.

Sorry about that. But I figured you'd rather have the truth than some half-assed lie to make you feel better about yourself, like that I was becoming a nun and heading off to a mission in Guatemala. That doesn't help anyone---you or me---so it's just best to tell the truth, that way you can go and start the healing process by getting shitfaced. There's a bar just down the street. Tell Jimmy, the bartender, that you know me and he'll spot you the first one.

Have a nice life. I know I will.

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February 06, 2006

Seizing Souter

A fancy, mainstream media follow-up on this post can be found here.

Go read the whole thing.

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Quickie Cake Eater Movie Review

I shot off to the movies tonight and saw The Worlds' Fastest Indian which is postively delightful. It's well worth the eight bucks.

A more complete---and not quite so quickie---pontification after the jump. more...

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We Got Your Blasphemy Right Here!

Forget all this hubbub about cartoons depicting Mohammed in a blasphemous way.

I've got something much, MUCH worse than all of that. You see, I found an Arabic version of one of the most famous and beloved songs in the American Songbook.

Ahem.

My devoted (and undoubtedly shocked) Cake Eater readers, I present to you the Arabic version of {insert sexy baseline here} Shaft.

Blasphemy against Isaac Hayes aside, I think we're safe in saying, however, that the dude whose work this is could not be considered a sex machine to all the chicks.

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February 04, 2006

"The White House Cookbook": Toilet Recipes, Items, Part Two

More fascinating early 20th century hair and skin care after the jump, including a recipe for freckle removal.

{Part One}

more...

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"The White House Cookbook": Toilet Recipes, Items, Part One

Those of you who enjoy fiddling with the essential oils display at The Body Shop will want to take the jump for ideas. (Yes, Mr. H. That means you.) more...

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Oh, Insomnia

Dude.

This being unable to sleep at three-fifteen a.m. thing sucks.

But seriously, folks.

It really, really sucks. I would like to sleep. I actually was asleep. Then I woke up because I was thirsty. I procured a glass of water and now, for some STRANGE REASON, I'm delineating this for all of you because I couldn't get back to sleep and I needed something to do.

How badly does my life suck right about now? Eh? Eh?

On second thought, don't answer that.

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February 03, 2006

"Hem Hem"

The Ministry of Magic has excellent casting news.

Yes, that's right, my devoted Cake Eater readers, I drank the pumpkin juice.

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Philosophikal and Stuff

Robbo's chatting about Shroedinger's Cat throwing shadows on Plato's Cave.

Or sumtin' like that.

Shoot on over and read.

In good news, I think I've found the husband a reasonably priced Valentine's Day present!

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February 02, 2006

"The White House Cookbook": Miscellaneous, Part Two

Tips for the hostess with the mostest after the jump!

Just a hint, but having servants apparently helps greatly.

{Part One} more...

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The Fed Jedi

Finally someone pegs Greenspan correctly.

One of the knocks I’ve heard on Bernanke is that he is, ironically, too plainspoken—that is, too easily understood. Much of Greenspan’s success can be attributed to his foggy, quasi-Zen-like pronouncements which, to me at least, often recalled Peter Sellers’ Chauncey Gardiner in Being There. There was a soothing potentially deep confusion to them—as if Yoda had taken a dose of LSD and suddenly whipped out an abacus.

Oh, Alan, we will miss thee.

You can go read the rest if you want. Me? I've just been visited by Mr. Chesterfield: I'm satisfied.

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Ahead of the Curve

Punk ass Opinion Journal is behind the times. And they got beat by a stay at home mom in Omaha.

{Insert Nelson Mundt HA-ha here}

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February 01, 2006

"The White House Cookbook": Miscellaneous, Part One

There's a rather large catchall section at the back end of the book---today, we're going to cover table etiquette.

Take the jump if you're dying to know why it's considered rude to blow on your food. more...

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Throwing the Snow

Yep.

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Like Rats From The Sinking Ship

Brrrr.

{...}Brillstein-Grey Entertainment literary manager Kassie Evashevski, who represented the author of "A Million Little Pieces" for more than four years, said she's not representing him anymore because of his tall tales.

"In the last week, it became impossible for me to maintain a relationship once the trust had been broken," Evashevski told Publisher Weekly for a story on Tuesday. "He eventually did apologize, but I felt for many reasons I had to let him go as a client."{...}

Putting aside the issue of Frey's lying for a secong, let's see precisely what the business angle is here. How much money did she and her agency make off Frey? Somewhere between 10-15% of the net of any royalties he gets---if not more---and that's after advances, options and the like. Methinks this has more to do with the fact that Warner Brothers is rethinking making the book into a movie. That's why they're dumping him, not because of any "trust" issues. They've gotten their money out of him, and will keep collecting money from any new sales, but that's all they're willing to do for him. Which is shitty, if you ask me. Yes, it's the real world, but damn. The guy did, after all, make you a boatload of cash. You could at least stick by him until the storm blows over and then dump him quietly.

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Regarding Curious George and Ron Howard

The Cake Eater Sister, Christi, sends this email along:

I have lately been bombarded with commercials advertising Curious George. I love George and so do the kids. It is done by Ron Howard, so you would think he is on the up and up...but, i have one huge gripe...on the commercial, there is an astounded "Man With the Yellow Hat" saying to George,"You followed me all the way from Africa?"

Okay, okay, do we really need to coddle our youth of today that much? Really, now, we can't tell the little kids that the nice man with the yellow hat really captured George to bring him back to a zoo in the United States?

Here's the trailer which has the offensive, coddling, politcally correct line that Christi's talking about. Although, it looks like more than just a line, but rather an extensive change in plot. Replete with a boat named the "H.A. Rey."

Christi then requests that I should do some research about this and "blow Ron out of the water" but I don't really think that's necessary at all as she covers the bases quite nicely.

Feel free to add your angst to hers, my devoted Cake Eater readers. That's what the comments section is for.

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Random Observation of the Day

If December is the delightful cocktail you just can't get enough of, January is the hangover.

Am I ever glad to be rid of this bloody hangover.

Hurrah for February!

UPDATE: And, yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm plagiarizing someone with this observation, but damned if I know---or care---who it is.

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January 31, 2006

"The White House Cookbook": Health Suggestions, Part Five

All sorts of helpful hints in regards to health after the jump.

{Parts one, two, three and four}

more...

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Lock 'Em Up

No, I'm not talking about illegal immigrants or criminals, but rather today's teenagers. And when I say "lock them up" the girls get locked in a convent and the boys gets stuck with a bunch of liquored up Jesuits who are determined to grill them for four years about the use of the past pluperfect in Latin.

Because, when they're left to their own devices, well....

{...}Alair is headed for the section of the second-floor hallway where her friends gather every day during their free tenth period for the “cuddle puddle,” as she calls it. There are girls petting girls and girls petting guys and guys petting guys. She dives into the undulating heap of backpacks and blue jeans and emerges between her two best friends, Jane and Elle, whose names have been changed at their request. They are all 16, juniors at Stuyvesant. Alair slips into Jane’s lap, and Elle reclines next to them, watching, cat-eyed. All three have hooked up with each other. All three have hooked up with boys—sometimes the same boys. But it’s not that they’re gay or bisexual, not exactly. Not always.

Their friend Nathan, a senior with John Lennon hair and glasses, is there with his guitar, strumming softly under the conversation. “So many of the girls here are lesbian or have experimented or are confused,” he says.

Ilia, another senior boy, frowns at Nathan’s use of labels. “It’s not lesbian or bisexual. It’s just, whatever . . . ”

Since the school day is winding down, things in the hallway are starting to get rowdy. Jane disappears for a while and comes back carrying a pint-size girl over her shoulder. “Now I take her off and we have gay sex!” she says gleefully, as she parades back and forth in front of the cuddle puddle. “And it’s awesome!” The hijacked girl hangs limply, a smile creeping to her lips. Ilia has stuffed papers up the front of his shirt and prances around on tiptoe, batting his eyes and sticking out his chest. Elle is watching, enthralled, as two boys lock lips across the hall. “Oh, my,” she murmurs. “Homoerotica. There’s nothing more exciting than watching two men make out.” And everyone is talking to another girl in the puddle who just “came out,” meaning she announced that she’s now open to sexual overtures from both boys and girls, which makes her a minor celebrity, for a little while.

When asked how many of her female friends have had same-sex experiences, Alair answers, “All of them.” Then she stops to think about it. “All right, maybe 80 percent. At least 80 percent of them have experimented. And they still are. It’s either to please a man, or to try it out, or just to be fun, or ’cause you’re bored, or just ’cause you like it . . . whatever.”

With teenagers there is always a fair amount of posturing when it comes to sex, a tendency to exaggerate or trivialize, innocence mixed with swagger. It’s also true that the “puddle” is just one clique at Stuyvesant, and that Stuyvesant can hardly be considered a typical high school. It attracts the brightest public-school students in New York, and that may be an environment conducive to fewer sexual inhibitions. “In our school,” Elle says, “people are getting a better education, so they’re more open-minded.” {...}

Read the whole thing. It gets worse/better. Depending upon how you view things.

There are times when I feel more like Methuselah rather than the thirty-five-year old that I am. This would be one of those times.

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